I hate conservatives! and I hate liberals! and I hate politics altogether! You can’t be young, upset, and female, and have anyone take you fucking seriously!
This is the money courage, reblog at your leisure for wealth, positivity and good fortune. Add any negativity to this post and a man will appear outside your home yelling “return the slab” over and over.
It began on a day cold and blustery, when Duncan Campbell’s boat came in from the sea, with a naked girl bound and shivering at his feet.
“I’ve caught me a seal-wife,” he announced, and we all knew the truth of it, from the sealskin slung around his shoulders and the girl’s strange liquid eyes, dark and round in a bone-white face. “Slippery as the devil she was, but catch her I did – and she’ll not escape me again!” And with that, he strode into the nearest cottage and flung the sealskin onto the fire.
That was that, then: none of us had ever seen a selkie, but all knew the tales: that stealing a selkie’s sealskin while she was in human form bound her to you as wife, and her only way of escape was to steal it back – but the skin was gone, and with it all hopes of return to the sea. We knew, too, why old Campbell had taken the girl: every unwed woman between fifteen and sixty had refused his suit, fearful of his violent temper and fondness for drink. But a selkie without her skin could not, and Campbell knew it well.
The rest of the tales proved just as true: the selkie was a meek, biddable wife, dutifully cooking and cleaning and whatever else Campbell barked at her to do. Quiet, too; whether this was true of all selkies, or only her husband’s fury whenever she so much as glanced at another person, nobody knew – but all had seen the bruises blooming on her skin.
Within a year she’d borne a son, with his mother’s dark hair and peculiar eyes. It was only then that we heard the selkie sing, stolen snatches of wordless lullaby, spine-tingling yet soothing, drifting from the cottage when her husband was at sea.
One chilly spring night, the shouting and thumps from Campbell’s cottage were louder than ever, and this time a child’s thin, high shrieks of pain could be heard. Abruptly they stopped; a shout from Campbell, then silence. I was asking myself if anything could be done for the child, even if these were private affairs, when I saw Campbell leave his cottage.
He was blood-soaked, and carrying the babe, clearly in a terrible hurry to his boat. I waited until he had gone, then dashed to his cottage and with great dread, pushed open the door.
Of the selkie herself there was no sign – but on the floor lay a man’s corpse, red and raw and awash with blood. With dawning horror, I saw it had been flayed.
I ran to the shore, but Campbell and the child had vanished. His boat, however, was still moored, and empty.
I raised my head to the sea, where two seals were swimming to the horizon. A small dark pup and its ghost-pale mother. On the wind, I caught the trails of the selkie’s eerie song.
All right, I can't bear this any longer: Could you PLEASE give us some context to those book covers you keep posting? Like what exactly are they, where do they come from, how did the author get those ideas, AND JUST HOW MANY OF THESE THINGS ARE THERE?! They are really weird and disturbing. I love them.
When I put them in the queue I thought everyone was going to get annoyed because they’ve seen them a million times, I feel terrible that so many of you guys haven’t!
There is this controversy in book industries about e-books; specifically Amazon who has made it easy for someone to self publish whereas before it would cost someone thousands of dollars and so if you did you were a loser because you obviously couldn’t get an agent or even get an indie publisher to back you. All of a sudden a million books are being self published by losers who are ruining literature because anyone can just print anything and nothing matters anymore. It’s the same thing they said when they invented the printing press and then again when trade paperbacks became a thing.
A whole bunch of people, mostly fanfic writers just repurpose in their work, start publishing these short erotic novels that they haven’t even edited and it was all getting weirder and weirder.
BDSM became mainstream because of EL James publishing her Twilight fanfiction ‘50 shades of gray’ and then suddenly there were a bunch of books that made people uncomfortable about time traveling to fuck dinosaurs. One erotic novel written by Christie Sims and Alara Branwen kind of became the poster child for the demise intellectualism.
A few years later someone calling themselves Chuck Tingle started to publish tiny erotica novels about people having sex with unicorns and Bigfoot that were intentionally weird with long and had highly specific titles. The covers went viral, most people thinking they were memes but then discovered they were real books that were actual short stories written by somebody who knew how to write and was obviously mocking the controversy.
Everyone was complaining and trying to find out who he was and journalists were trying to contact “him” but he refused to be interviewed. The popular rumor started going around that it was actually a father and son that wrote the books together and someone who everyone is probably sure was actually Chuck Tingle was anonymously interviewed and was like, “lol yeah and we usually write them start to finish in one night” which made people madder and was true because he really blew up when a meme about this dress went viral in a day and by the end of the day
Chuck
Tingle had a new erotic novel about fucking the dress.
Adding to the controversy is the fact that if you publish through Amazon people can read your books for free through their “digital library” but when people check out books it’s technically counted as a sale. Out of nowhere some dude named Chuck Tingle was at the top of the bestsellers list with these offensive books and sort of accidentally got nominated for a really prestigious award and everyone lost their shit.
The powers that be were changing the rules so he couldn’t win, which is what also happened to Neil Gaiman when his comic book Sandman got nominated and everyone was outraged that a comic book could be considered literature. Neil Gaiman actually won the award and then they put in a rule that no more comic books could be nominated, but they got lucky with Chuck Tingle and he didn’t win. Except then he was nominated for a second time.
Obviously Chuck Tingle didn’t win again,
but then he kind of doubled down and published books about getting fucked by his nomination and then fucked by the concept of getting fucked over by the industry. Then his book started getting really mostly sociopolitical and shoved his award nomination down everyone’s throats..
They were still just short weird erotica, but instead of being tongue-in-cheek funny they became condescendingly critical.
He has a website with an about me page but he’s become a folklore hero and everyone is 99% sure it’s fake.
As he stands now, the industries are still really upset but the indie scenes are considering them high art.
I am among the latter.
Don’t forget, the whole reason people nominated Chuck Tingle for the Hugo awards in the first place is because a lot of white male authors were really mad that women and racial minorities were winning awards. They nominated him, but of course, he wasn’t going to ruin the mystery by revealing himself, so instead he had someone go to the Hugos in his place… Zoe Quinn, who Gamergate centered around, and who was therefore the poster child of everything this group *hated*.
Chuck Tingle is a goddamn master.
Thank you for addingthat. I was about to be “but it wasn’t an accident he was nominated for a Hugo”
I am so happy to know the full story of Chuck Tingle.
Click on each picture to enlargen and read the text!
For those of you who asks me what scares me the most, it’s things like these. The fact that yes we do know a lot, but at the same time we know nothing.
95% of the ocean remains unexplored.
This is just a representation of the Mariana Trench, the deepest known part of the ocean.
Next to the letters at the bottom, take a closer look.
Anonymous
